Wednesday, December 30, 2015

Iman Shumpert's Out Here Killing the Dreams of a Nation!

Yall, #WeGottaTalk! For many, like myself, Teyana Taylor and Iman Shumpert had become the symbol of "young love", or as is popular on social media, definitely #RelationshipGoals. We have courted and loved with them. We have enjoyed their funny moments, as well as their loving ones. We were pregnant with Teyana, and shared their joy when she gave birth, into the arms of her adoring fiancee. Who can forget the two showing up at a halloween party dressed as Pinky and one of his "hoes"? Or the picture of him lifting his queen into the air as he exalted her praises, as the love of his life and future mother of his child? Then I woke up this morning to one of my favorite celebrity blogs, Fameolous, and saw this:
No, Cletus, say it ain't so! I've been rockin' with this couple from the beginning. They had become the epitome of young black love for this new generation (and older ones, like myself, lol!). The way that Iman expressed his love for Teyana had all the girls swooning, hoping and praying that one day, they would have a man to adore them in the way that he did Teyana. So what's with the BS, Iman? When Fameoulous initially hinted at some "inappropriateness" on Shumpert's part, I was like, "eh, everything isn't always what it seems." Let's just say that I know from experience, so I still gave Iman the benefit of the doubt...
Damn, Cletus. Damn. After going to the Fameolous website for the tea (which I won't spill, you will have to visit here to sip for yourself), all I can do is drop my head. I hope that what's laid out isn't true, because if it is, not only is Iman going to have to deal with a mad black woman at home, but he and his teammate, Kyrie Irving, look to be in some legal trouble, too. All for a little "thot-of-ass". smh... Why, Iman?!?!? Why?!?!?! All the hopes and dreams of black women across the nation hinged on the faithfulness, love, integrity, and committment exemplied in your relationship with our dear Teyana, especially with the birth of your child. You can't be killing the dreams of the masses like this!

No, but seriously, though, a lot of people did model relationship standards after what they thought was Teyana and Iman's perfect relationship. This just goes to show that no matter how perfect a relationship you think someone has, you never really know what's going on behind closed doors. I wish them the best, and hope that this piping hot tea turns out to not be exactly what it looks like. I honestly want to see these two young, black, successful individuals win at life, and in love! No one wants to see the demise of their relationship play out in the blogs. So with that being said, I leave you with this: Fameolous ain't the blog to be played with, but if you want the tea, Fameolous is the place to be! I'm just saying...

#WeGottaTalk
 

Monday, December 28, 2015

Why "The People" Won't Let R. Kelly Off So Easily

Why "The People" Won't Let R. Kelly Off So Easily 


Recently, R. Kelly was interviewed by HuffPost Live host Caroline Modarressy-Tehrani as part of his promotion for his latest album, "The Buffet". This happens to be R. Kelly's 13th studio release. During the interview, R. Kelly thought that he would only be asked questions about the album, and that this would be a glossed over interview where none of the tough questions would be asked. To say the least, R. Kelly was unpleasantly surprised. Kelly was so miffed about the questions being asked, that he even walked off set, exclaiming that the "interview is over"! Modarressy-Tehrani played no games with Kelly, asking him questions about his latest release, but also making sure to ask Kelly about the allegations of sexual assault/abuse of young (black) girls, questions he has tap danced and pranced around, but have dogged him, for years, including his marriage in 1994 to R&B princess Aaliyah.



I started to not even touch on this topic, but then I read a blog comment regarding R. Kelly walking out of this interview, which Kelly himself likened to a deposition. The comment, summed up, said "Don't just blame R. Kelly because those wenches knew what they were doing". *Sighhhhhhh* *Sighhhhhhhh again* So, we're really still here, people? Really? And it wasn't just that one comment. It should surprise me how many people share that same "victim-blaming" mentality, but sadly, it doesn't. We live in a day and age where a rape or beating is more likely to be recorded and posted to social media, than to be stopped or police called. What hurts me, though, is how Black people, my people, have normalized this type of sexual predatory behavior in our Black communities. To have men sexualize our young daughters, to take advantage of their young impressionable minds, have almost become a cultural norm in the Black community, and our answer, when called on it, is that "it's been going on for years". May be, but that still doesn't make it right. Just because your granddaddy married a fifteen year old when he was 62 and it was accepted, sho' don't make it right.

Take this into consideration. If R. Kelly were a white man, preying on young, black teenage girls, would we still be taking up for him? Would we still be justifying his actions, blaming the victims as having somehow asked for their own victimization? Kelly has not been accused once. He has been accused of sexual assault dozens of times by young women, mainly through lawsuits. If Kelly was white, despite his success as an artist, we would have been yelling "sick bastard!" and we wouldn't have been satisfied until he were punished for his deviant behavior. How do we make this the victims' fault? How many of us young men and women have done things in our youth that we regret, some of things life-altering events? As a teenage girl growing up idolizing one of the biggest R&B stars of our time, do we really think that it was hard for Kelly to coerce young women into sleeping with him? He is R. Kelly, right? But here's the thing, just because they acquiesced to his wishes, does not make them responsible.  That's why there are such laws as statutory rape laws.  These laws understand that minors are not known for making responsible decisions, and that ordinarily, they are immature and do not have the same sensibilities as adults.  As adults, we should know better.  R. Kelly should know better. I remember when I was a kid, and my sister asked me if I wanted a jheri curl like Michael Jackson. I was like "yeah!" I mean, who didn't want to be like Mike? When she cut my hair, and my mother found out, she was incensed! My shoulder length hair was now no longer than 2 inches long! Was I responsible for my sister's decision? No, because I was a child, and I acted, and thought, as a child would. My sister, as an adult, should have known better. See how that works?

We are in a social media driven age, and "The People" want answers.  A jury may have found him innocent in a court of law, but that does not mean that he is not guilty of deviant behavior with underaged girls! I saw the tape!  Because they are black girls, does not mean that we should not hold him accountable as if he were, say white. I hate it, but I guess R. Kelly's career can be summed up in this tweet:


I'm just saying...

#WeGottaTalk
 

Wednesday, December 23, 2015

That Ol' Throwback Kinda Love

So, I was talking to my girl friend the other day, and we heard this classic R&B single by Karyn White, "Can I Stay With You", come on the radio.  Oh, we threw our hands in the air like we were in church, and Karyn was the pastor! *Preach!!!* That song brought back so many memories! "Never felt so good before, never dreamed I would explore, making love in the positions that you've got me doing...."  We continued to talk and reminisce as the song played, and the subject of "old loves" became the topic of conversation.

Now, I'm going to be honest. My girl Lisa and I did some HEAVY dirt back in the day!  I wouldn't say we were hoes back then, but uhh....we were hoes back then! lol! But tasteful, tactful hoes, though! We're reformed hoes now, as we've put all of that way, way behind us, but sometimes, it does feel good to reminisce.  One rule I had back in the day, though, was to never sleep with the same person too many times, because you will most definitely "catch feelings", and falling in love was not the name of the game.  Still, sometimes it happened, and we definitely had friends that we caught feelings for...

So, Lisa tells me that one of her "old flames" had sent her an email, and that they had been chatting back and forth via email and texts, and sometimes by phone.  She's married now (we both are), and as much as she loves her husband, she confesses to me that she has never stopped loving her old flame.  He was such a special part of her life. He helped her through some very traumatic moments in her life, and he's always been her ideal man.  Due to circumstances beyond both their control, their lives took separate directions, and they both ended up marrying different people. Yet he's always held a special place in Lisa's heart.

via GIPHY

She hasn't made a move yet...so this story is subject to change at any moment. And I most definitely will keep you updated.

Do you have an old flame that still burns in your heart?
#WeGottaTalk
 

Tuesday, December 22, 2015

#LHHNY: Tara, Amina, and That Damn Peter Gunz!

Tara and Amina (vh1.com) 







So, here we go again with the what? Third or fourth season of Tara and Amina arguing over Peter Gunz. Peter Gunz? Yes, Peter Gunz. I don't know what kinda game Peter has, because every time I see him, he looks like he's on a hall pass from the special ed room. He's a nice looking man, but damn, he looks slow. I wonder what kinda conversation they have... Anyway, on this last episode of #LHHNY, Amina decides to confront Tara about her husband. Why she sees the need to do this, I haven't the faintest idea. I guess, in Amina's mind, she has every right to confront Tara, seeing as she feels that Tara and Peter are still sleeping together. She's correct--she has every right to confront Tara, but does that make it the right thing to do? I never would have confronted Tara about Peter, because if Amina was feeling in her spirit that somethin' in the air stank, then she should have trusted her instinct. If she knows nothing by now, it's that Peter will cheat, and Peter will lie. So why keep allowing herself to be trampled on? Well, love is a mighty powerful thing, but lack of respect for yourself is even more powerful.

Anywhoo, Tara decides to stage a "Peter-vention", where Amina and her would confront Peter and the truth would set them all free. Girl, bye! Ain't nobody that damn stupid! Tara didn't do that because she was on some noble quest for the truth; she did it because that was one more time that she could rub her relationship with Peter in Amina's face. I mean, what truth does she need? She KNOWS that she's still screwing Peter. She KNOWS that he's still married to Amina, regardless of what he claims to be the status of their relationship. So what more does Tara need to know? Oh, she knows that Peter means her, nor Amina, any good, but for some reason, these two ladies just can't let go. Then, according to the blogs, Tara is ALLEGEDLY pregnant by Peter, and the last thing we here Amina yell at him is that she's pregnant, too! #DisTewMuch
via GIPHY
When in the hell does this three-way from hell end? I'm about to name some of my Sims© characters after Peter, Tara, and Amina, and just move them all in together. One big happy family. Makes more sense this way, doesn't it? I mean, Tara wants to win, but if the prize is Peter, has she won anything? Because if he doesn't cheat with Amina, it will be with someone else. The same goes for Tara. At least if they walk away from this situation, maybe they both can come away with some sense of dignity, and maybe, one day, find what real love is. I've found from being in a similar situation that the best thing that a woman can do is to love herself. When she loves herself, that love is so powerful, that it WILL NOT allow a woman to remain in a situation where she is not respected and valued. Been there, done that, got a badge to prove it. Yet these women are too busy swearing that every decision that they make is for their kids. Let me tell ya, your kids will never want their mother to be devalued and unloved. When mommy's happy, the kiddos are happy. But, what say you?

#WeGottaTalk
 

Fetty Wap says "Eye Promise It Ain't Mine"

daileyentertainmentnews.com
Masika and Fetty (dailyentertainmentnews.com)              

See, this is that sh** I'm talking about! Now, I was riding with Fetty at first, but this bull he's pulling with Masika Kalysha...mane, I can't with this ninja!

I'm sure that you have been exposed to one or more blogs or gossip sites that reported that Masika Kalysha has hit paydirt...I mean, is now pregnant, and the father is alleged to be Fetty Wap.  This comes as no surprise, considering for a minute that they were all boo'd up, with pictures posted all across social media. Not only has Fetty been boo'd up with Masika, but he also has his MAIN side chick, aka Alexis Sky, and when I say this, I mean it, and only GOD knows who else.

AND THEN THIS HAPPENS!


(hotnewhiphop.com)
Masika gets knocked up! But guess what? This is a special kinda pregnancy. You know, one of those pregnancies that actually require two people to actually have sex and create a life. Yeah, one of those.  I didn't know if you had actually heard of one of those types of pregnancies, seeing as sh** like this appears to be new to Fetty.

Now, in this age of social media, "thotting", and come ups, it's no wonder that Masika Kalysha is pregnant, singing "and I'm keeping my baby" (in my Madonna voice).  I strongly doubt that Masika was ever truly in love with Fetty, as he obviously wasn't in love with her, but they had enough "like" for one another to screw and possibly make a baby.  He got what he wanted--a hot new, social media socialite on his arm, and she got what she wanted--some rich d***.  Now that she's pregnant, and plans to keep the baby, this, in the social media world, makes her "a winner".

According to TMZ,  Fetty ain't wanting no baby with Masika, and his initial reaction was to ask why she didn't have an abortion.  Masika ALLEGEDLY told Fetty that she didn't believe in abortion, and his ALLEGED retort is that she obviously didn't believe in condoms. He ALLEGEDLY tells her that he will not participate in raising the child, and that he wants a DNA test.



via GIPHY
I can completely understand Fetty Wap for wanting a DNA test.  He's a very wealthy young man, and many people are looking at him, Chris Brown, and others like them, as goldmines.  This is why men like Fetty piss me the hell off! YOU KNOW GOOD AND DAMN WELL THAT THESE LADIES ARE LOOKING TO COME UP! SO WHY ARE YOU ACTING SURPRISED WHEN THEY BECOME PREGNANT?  That is what sex is for--so that we can be fruitful and multiply.  If your azz doesn't want to be F.A.M., then you must use protection!

It's up to you, up to US, to protect ourselves!  Fetty ain't no damn fool...he just plays one on TV.  You can't tell me that he actually fell for the "I'm on the pill" line. That sh** is as old as Betty White (I love her, though)! I don't care if a woman says they are on the pill, it is up to the man to make sure that he protects himself, and vice versa. If you celebrity men don't want to cut those big azz checks for these little bastard children that you didn't want in the first place, then start taking some responsibility for yourself, and PROTECT YOURSELF!  If you don't, then don't go crying talking about "it ain't mine", and don't be surprised when she's singing "Poppa Don't Preach" to your stupid azz.  I'd keep it, too! Hell, I'm tired of working. Somebody cut me a check! Somethings we set ourselves up for...yeah, Fetty, you did that!

And FYI...Fetty's saying that he doesn't want any part in raising the baby ain't hurting Masika.  Hell, you've done your job.  You've given her an 18 year paycheck, and she doesn't even have to pretend to love that one good eye you have. #BoyBye


Blufenix75
#WeGottaTalk

Monday, December 21, 2015

#RHOA: What in the Hell is Phaedra Thinking?

Ok. First of all, let's make one thing abundantly CLEAR--in no shape, form, or fashion did the actions of Kenya Moore (I can't even believe that I just said that, because I'm definitely no Kenya Moore fan) cause the explosive, violent behavior that was displayed by Glen Rice, Jr. on last night's episode of Real Housewives of Atlanta.  I think it's obvious that Glen Rice, Jr. was a disrespectful, entitled asshole before he ever graced our television screens. Glen is the type that will call a woman every name except for "Child of God", just because she rebukes his advances.  "F*** you, b****!" Ask Glen. I bet he's said it a thousand times (probably saying it to someone right now).

Now, last night, as disturbed as I was by Glen's ratchet-azz attitude and volatile behavior (for a full recap, see http://straightfromthea.com/2015/12/21/recap-rhoa-season-8-ep7-miami-spice-watch-full-video/ ) , there were 2 more issues that were that just SCREAMING to be addressed:  the victim blaming that was displayed during the show, and Phaedra's attempt to draw a correlation between Glen Rice, Jr., and Micheal Brown, which to say the least, was less than a poor comparison.

Let's talk about the victim blaming.  This reminds me of something I read about Amber Rose just the other day.  Amber claimed to have been sexually assaulted, (at school, mind you) and when she went to the principal's office to report what had happened to her, she was told that she shouldn't have worn the skirt that she had on that day. Also reminds me of Lynn Whitfield's character in Tyler Perry's "Madea's Family Reunion" telling her movie daughter, upon the revelation that the daughter's husband (played by Blair Underwood) was beating her, that she must stop doing whatever it is that she does to provoke him.  This situation with Glen Jr. is no different.  Glen is obviously a hothead.  Just this October, Glen was shot in the leg during an altercation at T.I.'s restaurant in Atlanta, after a verbal altercation became physical (http://www.tmz.com/2015/10/26/glen-rice-jr-shot-in-leg-in-fight-at-t-i-s-restaurant/). And it took very little to rile him up during the RHOA trip.  Glen has an explosive attitude, and that is not the fault of anyone that was on that Miami trip.  Glen is responsible for his own actions. He is a grown azz man!  He could have bridled his tongue, and if they wanted him to leave, he could have, EASILY, without any confrontation.  As far as Kenya telling him that she would like for him to leave because he made some of the ladies feel uncomfortable, who can blame her? Hell, he made me uncomfortable, and I was sitting at home!

People, there is such a thing as instigating and inciting a fight. Kenya did neither (although the other ladies' dislike of Kenya have surely biased their opinions of what happened).  His response was inappropriate to his situation.  Calling women "bitches" and "hoes", without provocation, was unnecessary.  Pushing through people to try to physically reach Kenya was excessive, and had security not been present, who knows what would have happened?  We need to stop telling women that being abused, whether physically or verbally, is something that they "asked for". He was disrespectful from the moment that he got screen time. Kandi didn't ask, nor provoke, him to get "turnt up" with her, and he stepped to Kenya like he was about to fight a dude. All unnecessary responses, when all he had to do was what--just leave! I was shocked, and almost offended, that Phaedra and some of the other ladies would insinuate that Kenya, or anyone else for that matter, caused Glen Rice, Jr. to act in the manner that he did.  Not saying that one can not be provoked, just in this particular instance, it certainly wasn't the case.

Now, for Phae-Phae! Phaedra, Phaedra, Phaedra! #WeGottaTalk! Love, what were you thinking?! As soon as the words crossed your lips, I wanted to reach inside the television and pop you in your damn throat (and I say that with love)! I am a fan of Phaedra, but this time, Phaedra's ramblings weren't spot on, they were dead wrong.  You can not, I say again, YOU CAN NOT, and WILL NOT, draw a comparison between the behavior exhibited by Glen Rice, Jr, someone's whose violent temperament may have caused him to be shot in the leg (where he was also seen to be discarding a gun), to the murders of Trayvon Rice and Michael Brown.  That is the correlation that "White America", and society in general, wants us to believe.  That all young black men are violent, hostile, and angry.  I wasn't there to see Trayvon murdered, but I do know that he was walking home while talking to a friend, which leads me to believe that his behavior was no where similar to that of Glen's.  His murder was unnecessary, and unprovoked.  They want us to believe that Michael's behavior was like that of Glen's, and that he deserved to be shot.  For you to see Glen's behavior, and to make that comparison on TELEVISION-- I was flabbergasted (in my Katt William's voice).  Yes, you should be worried about Glen.  Behavior like his is more likely to get him shot in his own 'hood, than by the police.  Instead of drawing comparisons to Michael Brown and Trayvon Martin, what you should have been doing is trying to tell that young man, "Look, if you don't get your sh** together, you are going to end up dead."  I don't know how this young man was raised, but his parents cannot be proud. Every young man like Glen is NOT Trayvon, because EVERY young, black man is not walking around with a chip on his shoulder. That was an unfair comparison, Phaedra. Unintentional, but very, very wrong, and unfair.

Blufenix75
#WeGottaTalk